JanDunlap.com » Minnesota

The countdown is on for 3rd Bob White Birder Murder

admin — Mon, 02 Aug 2010 19:32:19 +0000

A funny thing happened on the MOU listserve last week. (If you aren’t familiar with the listserve, it’s the Minnesota Ornithologists Union’s means of keeping all the birders updated on what bird was seen where, along with other items of interest to Minnesota birders. Since I am a member of the MOU (as is my fictional protagonist Bob White), I get all the emails, and the one that caught my eye last week was a sighting of Northern Bobwhites, which is the premise of my third Birder Murder, titled “A Bobwhite Killing”. Another birder responded to the one who saw the bird, explaining that Northern Bobwhites are no longer considered wild in Minnesota because they have been so domesticated by farms. This is true, as I point out in my new book. Because it IS fiction, though, I do take a little creative license in my story…and that’s all I can tell you because I don’t want to spoil the story. I just thought it was one of those funny coincidences in my life – just as my book about a Bobwhite is about to debut, Bobwhites pop up in the MOU listserve.

This reminded me of when my first book, “The Boreal Owl Murder” came out. Boreal Owls were almost impossible to find in the northernmost reaches of the state for many years….until the year my book came out. Then there was a flood of sightings of them that winter of 2008. Everytime I had a book talk, I’d explain how Boreals were very hard to find…usually. The owls were making a liar out of me publicly. Actually, this profusion of a bird wasn’t unique – I recall some winters back when we had Great Grey Owls all over the place, and other years have likewise been marked by unusual numbers of an atypical bird for the region and/or time of year. It’s all part of the intrigue and variety of the world of birding.

A final note – I just saw that “A Bobwhite Killing” is now listed on Amazon.com for advance orders. That means I’ll be out promoting the book in another month. I hope to see you soon!

New Recession on the Horizon

admin — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 13:53:45 +0000

Chaska, MN (DWI) – Just as the American economy is poised to make a recovery from the past few years’ recession, new indicators released today predict another downturn is in the near future.

“I can’t help it!” protested mother-of-the-bride-to-be Jan Dunlap. “Once my daughter gets married next week, that’s it! I’m not spending another dime!”

Economic experts credit the nation’s recent months’ financial improvement to the Dunlap family’s spending on their daughter’s upcoming wedding. Citing massive influxes of money to a wide segment of vendors in the marketplace, Dr. Shome Damonie, a little known authority on investment and washing machine repair, claimed that the family’s expenses have provided employment for thousands of workers.

“We’re talking about wide-spread economic incentive here,” Dr. Damonie said. “We’ve got new money flowing into shoe stores, dress shops, online printers, florists and independent cake ladies. Thanks to the fact that the Dunlaps have offered their wedding guests a salmon option for the dinner, we’re even seeing a boom in the Pacific Northwest salmon industry. Fish ain’t just for breakfast anymore, ya know.”

Damonie noted that tortilla chips and goat cheese suppliers are also enjoying improved bottom lines as a result of the upcoming nuptials. “What can I say?” a beleaguered Dunlap sighed. “The bride wants goat cheese and tortilla chips for appetizers, so that’s what the bride gets. What am I supposed to do? Tell her she can open a few dozen cans of peanuts?”

Local merchants are not complaining.

“I’m thrilled to have a gig with the wedding,” said area accordianist Polka Pete, formerly known on the local club circuit as lead singer with Hairy Peter and the Prisoner of Skabana. “I thought I’d find work with all the churches that have polka worship services, but since the recession began, even that market has dried up. I told the Dunlaps I could do New Age music and a pretty decent imitation of Yanni for their reception, but I guess it was too edgy for them. I think they got some disc jockey instead.”

When asked to comment, Dunlap said, “I hate that man. But he was cheap and we just needed some pre-service music. I think he’s going to play ‘Edelweiss.’ If he tries to play anything else, I’m going to shoot him.”

The most interesting trickle-down effect of the Dunlap financial splurge is the involvement of Leon McAllister of Leather Repair in St. Paul.

“She had me over to the house and said she wanted it smooth again,” McAllister said.

“It’s not what you think!” Dunlap was quick to add. “Leon is repairing the claw damage that our cat has wreaked on my favorite leather chair. We’re having a lot of family over for an Open House before the wedding, and I wanted the chair to look nice. As a matter of fact, the cat is going to be staying at the kennel during the week of the wedding. I don’t want to risk any scratches in the chair after I’m paying an arm and a leg to get the old scratches repaired.”

“We’re happy to have the cat stay with us,” said the kennel owner. “We charge an arm and a leg, too.”

When informed that all this expenditure will dry up once the bride and groom say “I do” next week, the Chaska economic development council called an emergency meeting.

“We need to assess the impact that the loss of the Dunlap’s wedding spending will have on our community,” said Ross Czhenklnsprnylzmshyski of the council. “It will certainly result in unemployment and a loss of revenue to the city, as well as the state of Minnesota. We may have to consider some kind of bail-out for our local businesses, who have become accustomed to this higher spending level over the last eight months. I think it’s clear that the Dunlaps were totally irresponsible in their lack of concern for the repercussions of their private soiree.”

When asked to comment, Dunlap rolled her eyes. “Wait till his daughter gets married,” she said.

(DWI is the privately owned news-gathering agency Dunlap World Intel.)

Nomination for 2nd Birder Murder

admin — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 13:20:05 +0000

I just received confirmation that my second Bob White Birder Murder, “Murder on Warbler Weekend,” has been nominated for the 2009 Minnesota Book Award. That makes it two for two, since the first book in the series “The Boreal Owl Murder” received a nomination last year. Finalists will be announced in February.

This coming March is shaping up to be an interesting marketing month for me. The first weekend of the month I’ll be at the International Owl Festival in Houston, MN. Last year’s event was delightful, so I’m looking forward to meeting birders and signing books there again. For the last weekend in the month, I’ve been invited to come speak and sign books at the National Eagle Center in Wabasha, MN. I haven’t visited the new center there yet, and I’m really excited about seeing it and watching those gorgeous Bald Eagles from the center’s perfect vantage point. Check my events calendar for times and dates!